What Are You NOT Willing To Do?

What are you not willing to do... that she did?

Looking out into the dating world sometimes leaves me with a gasp. Heck, I even look back on the things I've done and turn my head.  Tsk, tsk. But we live and we learn.

Now before I start I will say, I'm all for equality, BUT don't believe the hype, chivalry is only dead if you bury it yourself. With that being said...

I see young women, heck even older women who are fighting for their "loyalty" to be noticed by the men they have eyed and set out to conquer. From asking men out, picking up the tab...everytime, even first dates and let's not forget being at their beck in call for any and everything. Oh and did I mention this was all before the whole, will you be my girlfriend question.

One of my characters in my latest fiction novel, Cut to the Chase, goes above and beyond to show her devotion which in turn leaves the man with little to do.

 Does going this route make one a better candidate or does it put the woman in the, this chic will do anything for a man, category?

 Do men really test this way? Are women doing too much to become a girlfriend?

I'm no man so I would dare answer this but it seems as if the going thing is to spread yourself thin while he chooses who is down for him the most?

What say you? Men... care to chime in?


Keshia Dawn

Giving Chances

 

 

In all of the dating world, we pretty much go after what we like. Right? But what would happen if we turned things around and gave chances to someone or something out of our norm?

 

When you’ve been labeled as someone who continuously picks from the same cactus patch instead of the bed of roses, what happens when you  turn it all around? You know, ditch the Timberlands or bust attitude, read all of the handbooks you possibly can, and go to the altar seeking prayer from your wayward dating-wrong-can’t-get-it-right self? Or something like that.

 

Let’s see, how can I say this? Hmmm, give in. Give in to someone who you know or think you know will not be your cup of tea and settle for what society says will be the ideal catch. I guess I should ask, what happens when you give chances? I’ll tell you.

 

It enlightens you, brings hope back into your dead-dating world and refreshes your ideas of this grandiose love affair you’ve designed in your colorful brain; it hands you anticipation for love once again.  It shows how you may have been a little naïve to what is right for you, your wants and your needs.

 

To add, you gain the best dating experience ever. Because you aren’t expecting anything from “your type” but rather enjoy the freshness and the realness of what you really long for instead of what you think you want, a true dating capability is finally allowed a chance.

 

It opens a door for loving possibilities….BUT

 

There is the elephant in the room. I know it will be questioned, soooo.  Even with all of the niceness, proper dating and the availability for love, what do you do when your belly doesn’t jump? There is no rumble in your tummy, butterflies in your gut and the connection you want there to be…doesn’t exists? It’s just something that won’t allow you to mesh. Or so you think.

 

With each relationship, I’ve grown in the department in knowing that everything on my checklist isn’t guaranteed. The height, the look, the singling capabilities (ha! Joking). But seriously, you grow from the superficial reflection of your yesteryear and evolve into an adult who realizes there is more to life than matching shirts on fair day. 

 

Chemistry, to some extent, is what you make it. The connection grows in the way you tend, nurture and give it room to cultivate.  What helps with this? Realizing you  just may not be someone’s first draft pick yourself. Ah ha! See, it’s a possibility you’ve been given a chance.

 

The way we date, with eyes wide open, minds shut off just may be the cause of our drought in the dating/relationship department. Maybe giving chances to someone who may just be giving us a chance is the way to go?

 

You think?

 

~Keshia Dawn

I'm Back!

It feels like a lifetime but I'm back! Today I release my sixth book and I'm so excited about it.!

CUT TO THE CHASE is a novel I feel will show my readers even more of who I am through my writing.  Full of laughter, strong women and real life issues... I can't wait to hear your feedback!

There is so much ahead and I'm happy I have an avenue to share.  With  CUT TO THE CHASE being the first book in THE CHASE series,  I'm currently working hard on book two and plan to release it in January. The title and book cover coming soon!

For those of you who took the S.L.O.W. Down movement with me,  you'll be delighted to see the highlights in my novel! That's right,  I brought S.L.O.W. Down to life! I truly felt there could not be one without the other and hopefully you feel the same as my characters journey through.

I'm adamant about women's issues and will continue to intertwine my support in both fiction and non-fiction. I feel it is an important duty of mine, just as someone passed on to me,  to help by any means necessary,   women maneuver from a possible stale place in life,  to mental freedom, heart full of gladness and peace and joy!


Please stay tuned as S.L.O.W. Down is re birthed, Book Two releases and so much more to come.   I can't wait to hear your thoughts!

Until then,  happy reading and passing on the word!!

Keshia Dawn

Is Dating a Sport?

Since my last entry, my upcoming release, Cut to the Chase has found its home on Amazon's pre-order page! Can I get a whoop, whoop! Thanks.

 So of course I'm in full-throttle mode, writing book two in The Chase series and writing snippets down for the third installation (yep, there will be a third). Dealing with Christina, Nedra, Randi and Millie with their dating DOs and DON'Ts has sparked a flare in my thinking cap. And out of the blue a question pops into my ever racing mind.

Is dating a sport?

I know, I know. How can you compare the two? But think about it, how can you not?

In most instances, it's no longer, boy meets girl, dates girl and marries girl. It lingers a bit longer. More like boy meets girls, dates girls, dates girls, dates girls and oh yeah, dates girls.  Or of course vice versa.

Now this is all fine and dandy if no one is seeking more than a mere date here and there. But what if more is wanted? What if marriage is the ultimate goal?

Well just like different sports activities can be exciting and rewarding, the game ends and only one team wins. As well with dating, is it a game?

When you realize you are in the game, the sweating begins. The nervousness of doing, saying, and being what you think the other person wants plays a part. Do you tweak who you are, what you do and what you really want? Do you settle for what is offered knowing the package is only a third of what you know you need?

The chasing. Do you show your aggression by running toward someone who may be running from you?

Then there are the muscles. You guessed it. The heart muscles are stretched, pinched and pulled in every which away. And just like a torn ligament, it takes time and relaxation from the activity which the heart so dearly yearns.

Dating may have you sitting on the sideline at times but just like any trained sport, every act starts in the mind so never forget to plan your plays.

So I question. Do you think dating is used in a sport like manner? Who can get the trophy? Who gets the win?

Just a thought

~Keshia Dawn

Cut to the Chase

Are you at the age when you feel there definitely should to be a ring on your finger? Yes, that finger (Who came up with that rule anyway, right?) 

Ever think, "There has got to be a better way. What if I..." And you fill in the blank with the most hideous idea! Right, me either. 

For those who really are tired of the singleness or for those who are in stale relationships, just how far would you go to become a Mrs. to a Mr.? Online dating, impromptu hookups from your friends, singles events...jocking-your-friend's-dad? Oooooooooo or gross; you choose.

Just what is considered taboo, as far as women getting to the altar by any means necessary? Would you be willing to pay for all of the lunch dates, movie dates and let's not forget about putt-putt golf. 

What about buying airfare for the weekend get-a-way? Or hooking him up with a nice wardrobe when he turns you down for the black tie affair because he doesn't own a tux? Are you willing to slide your credit card once or twice?

Then there are the guys who keep you in limbo. You know, the ones who go by the rules, what she don't know won't hurt her and then fifty years later you find out he's an ax murderer. No really, it happens.

It's questionable how far us ladies should allow ourselves to be strung along hoping the right question will soon be asked. The one that leads with, "Will you be my..."

Should we help the naive, never gonna get it guys out or allow them to go at their own pace? Should we backdate our questions to find out what they really have going on or sit mum and look pretty. Don't forget to bat your eyelashes.

Whatever you choose, choose wisely. Cut to the chase and you may just cut off the path to what is really meant to be.

~ Keshia Dawn

CUT TO THE CHASE - Available October 7, 2014

With the support of one another, four friends battle the unwanted singleness that has engulfed them far too long. Seeking a resolution to walk down the aisle sooner than later, each come up with their own plan hoping it will lead them to become a Mrs. to the right Mr., even if it means cutting to the chase in order to do so.

 

Christina is a single mother and figures it’s time to allow someone into the world she has built for herself and her son Niko. When an old love reappears, she enlists the help of funny and witty Dr. Vile to help with her dating  dilemmas. Especially when Niko's principal adds to her confusion by letting her know he has more than pencils and paper on his mind.

Nedra is the mother-hen of the group. With her world revolved around being the church's secretary, taking notes for her dad who is also the pastor, Nedra is engulfed in a world she once ran from. Still holding herself hostage from mistakes from years ago, Nedra figures eating Twizzlers and online dating is all she deserves.

Unlike the other women, Randi has the greatest boyfriend in the world. Except he won't propose. At the age of thirty-one Randi figured Phillip would have asked for her hand in marriage by now. Not willing to wait another day, Randi has made a decision she believes Phillip will have no choice but to accept.

Millie, the youngest of the group is feisty and she knows it. In love with Mr. Wrong, her colorful vocabulary allows her to proclaim to be the long lost daughter of Blues singer Millie Jackson. Figuring a piece of a man is better than no man at all, Millie hangs on as Taser takes her through love's highs and lows.

Cut to the Chase takes readers through the woes of being single while fighting for hope through relationship possibilities.