Phases

By now you should know that I've allowed myself to become transparent. Not on "purpose" But in purpose.

It's amazing how life hands you obstacles;  some which lead to happiness and others you believe will down right kill you. In all of my, "Lord I know this will kill me moments, " I never thought I'd end up where I am. Free and transparent.

My life may mirror so many others, may be a priceless to some and others may shake their heads. Whatever THEY may say, I know my own truths and even though I won't claim my childhood a total write off,  there are some things I could have lived without.

Years progressed and life sailed on. But even with a nice breeze, the waves can still rock the boat. What does that mean? It means I inadvertainly took junk with me into my adulthood. I let the sting of my youth travel with me into my adulthood instead of allowing it to scab over.

When I was younger, I had a habit of holding cups in my mouth with my teeth, leaving my hands free. I'm not sure if it was all for fun or just for the challenge to see if I could do it; drink my refreshment faster and without spilling it. 

One day, I repeated this hobby while sitting on my aunt's porch one hot summer's day. Thinking nothing of it, I placed the refreshment up to my mouth and began to clinch down with my little teeth. It took no longer than a couple of seconds before blood started to gush from my mouth.

Out of habit I trusted that the same thing I had been doing over and over would give me the same results. What I didn't consider was that unlike the cups which previously played along, the glass I clinched this time would leave a scar that I still own, on the left side of my mouth. 

My physical scar took a while to heal but it did. It went through the phase of stinging and bleeding before it actually started to seal up and scab over. Before it was all said and done, I was left with remnants of all I had gone through, but it no longer hurt. 

Though you've been through life's ups and downs, heartache without understanding, hurt by loved ones, relationships have left you broken, unemployment has left you homeless and having to start over from scratch, and is still etched in your heart and mind.... you're still here. 

Even with wounds we can persevere over it all. It takes time, nourishment to our pain and learning to reverse what brought pain to us to begin with. 

Take a moment to reflect on what is stinging in your life and honestly write down the steps that can lead you to freedom. Allow the healing to begin.

All in love,

~Keshia Dawn



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